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  • Writer's pictureDoula Ashley

Choosing your Provider: Part 2

Choosing the person/people that will be helping you bring your baby into the world is perhaps the number one choose you will make for your pregnancy, birth and baby! It's a choice that sometimes does not come with a lot of thought put into it other than, "My friends went to this doctor/midwife and had a great experience." That is good and valuable information but do your friends have the same values that your family does? Would your friends, given a similar situation, make the same dicisions you would make?

A values conversation is where you want to start before making any choices for your pregnancy or birth. What are my values around this event in my life? Take some time with your partner (maybe have an ice cream date) and discus this question together. Have a piece of paper ready and write those values down. It may be important that this baby is brought into the world as peaceful as possible. It may be that you want to make sure that you are well informed and making all of the choices for your birth. One of your values may also be that your family is included in the process, as much as possible, or it may be a very private matter just between the two of you as a couple. Whatever they may be make sure that you know what they are and that you and your partner are on the same page.

Now that we have been intentional about knowing what are values are, we can choose a provider based on those values. My biggest advice after 10 years as a Doula is make exploritory appointments with multiple providers before making your choice. Even if you have been with an OBGYN practice for many years, still interview other providers. Sometimes you can't know, what you don't know, until you are well informed!

Here are 4 things to consider when choosing a provider for your Birth:

#1: How many Doctors/Midwives are in this practice?

Modern OBGYN practics and even Midwifery practices can be very large. If one of your values is to be known by the person that will be delivering your baby then a larger practise would not be for you.

#2: How well did this provider listen to me?

You know when you are not being heard! It's sometimes a feeling you have, if not outright blantant that the person before is not truly HEARING the words that are coming out of your mouth! This is so important. If the provier rushes you or seems like they want to close the meeting up before you are ready. They are not the provider for you!

#3: Does what this provider says and their practices match up?

Maybe one of your values is to be a natural as possible throughout your pregnacy and birthing experices. You ask these kinds of questions to the provider and they affirm that they are a very naturally minded practise. After your meeting your looking up there c-section rate and it's 40% (the national c-section average is 33% and WHO estimates that it should be 15%). There is a big discrpance here between what the doctor is saying and what actuially takes place in his practise if his c-section rate is more that double what a healthy c-section rate should be! (NOTE: You may also want to look up the c-section late of the hosptal that they provider delivers at. These numbers are a LARGE indictor of the practices that happen at that hospital.

#4: Will this provider be my guide or will they make the decisions for me?

This is another felt experince! In the way that provider communicates you can tell how they will practise. "We usuallt dont let you..." "Our policy is that..." These are both indicators that your choices may not be honored when the rubber meets that road!

Knowing what your values are as it relates to pregnancy and birth is the first step in taking back your sovereignty and being the lead decision maker for your health and your baby's health. It's the point from which all your choices will flow. Then you will be able to choose a provider that aline with your values and is more than happy put you at the ultimate authority on your health!


Ashley also offers coaching sessions on how to choose or find a provider that is good for you. Maybe, you are further along in your pregnancy and releasing you may be with the wrong provider. It is NEVER too late to choose a different people to help you with your birth. Book a coaching appointment with Ashley by clicking the button below!

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